Updated: May 29, 2020
Shakespeare, Jay-Z, Walt Whitman, Eminem, LeVeon Bell. One of these things is not like the other. In honor of the Steelers game this week against the New York Jets and LeVeon Bell, I decided to dive into the best lyrics Bell has ever rapped to the world.
Note: I quickly realized that Lev’s lyrics aren’t easily available online. Even Genius.com only provides lyrics to one or two of Bell’s “biggest hits”. So know this reader — I had to painstakingly listen and transcribe LeVeon Bell’s latest mixtape to decipher what he’s saying in the songs. It’s possible that there could be some mistakes.
Lyrics Meaning: At some point a nice lady asked him for a vacation, but Lev had other plans. I couldn’t figure out exactly what “Colin’s” was. Maybe he’s taking her to his friend Colin’s house? There’s also a bar in Jersey with pretty good reviews called Collins Restaurant. Maybe that’s what she had to settle for?
Being a female in Lev Bell’s life doesn’t seem very rewarding. I suppose after he was robbed by a pair of escorts in Miami back in June for over $500k in jewelry LeVeon tightened the belt a bit.
Lyrics Meaning: He puts valuables away in a safe. Just ask those escorts from Miami.
I found it fascinating how awkwardly Bell needed to twist his sentence structure here just to find a word that rhymes with “safe”. If there’s proof that Bell doesn’t use a ghostwriter, it’s here in this line. When was the last time Kobe rocked the number 8? (Answer: 2006)
Lyrics Meaning: The Jets are retarded. I don’t even have to hide from the fact that whatever contract the Jets are about to give me is really bad for them.
Bell takes a less than subtle jab at the Steelers with the song title “Free At Last” while simultaneously shitting on all the teams interested in signing him when he wrote this in the spring of 2019. Seriously, can you imagine how pissed his agent was when this song came out? I’m no Drew Rosenhaus, but telling teams you’re about to rob them doesn’t seem like the strongest bargaining chip.
Lyrics Meaning: Bell reminisces about his time spent with a romantic interest named K.O.D. at a strip club. There’s not enough context here to know what exactly is going on, but I sense there could be some foul play. One thing is for sure: he has one hell of a wig.
I’m not even shitting you, this is a real line in his song Overrated. I embedded it into the article to listen for yourself. I had to play it 26 times to try and make out what he actually says. I challenge you to listen to it and make out better lyrics:
Lyrics Meaning: While most of Bell’s lyrics are arrogant and superfluous, he must have written this one with a bit of modest foresight. His gas tank is currently on E. Nothing is more apparent when you compare his stats in 2019 compared to any year he played in Pittsburgh.
And while it’s been a slow season on the field for Bell, his rap career has been….well it’s been something. Check out his latest high budget music video “Slide” where Bell kills half of Al-Qaeda while hanging upside down before throwing an axe into a guy’s heart in a sloppy rain fight.